Lewis Moody, the former England rugby captain and 2003 World Cup winner, has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease.
The 47-year-old told the BBC he was having trouble accepting what the news meant for his future, and for his family, though his symptoms were relatively mild.
“There’s something about looking the future in the face and not wanting to really process that at the minute. It’s not that I don’t understand where it’s going. We understand that. But there is absolutely a reluctance to look the future in the face for now.”
Fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow died from the illness in recent years, with rugby – and in particular the England skills coach, Kevin Sinfield – embracing a high-profile fundraising campaign to tackle it.
Moody said: “You’re given this diagnosis of MND and we’re rightly quite emotional about it, but it’s so strange because I feel like nothing’s wrong. I don’t feel ill; I don’t feel unwell. My symptoms are very minor. I have a bit of muscle wasting in the hand and the shoulder.
“I’m still capable of doing anything and everything. And hopefully that will continue for as long as is possible.”
MND can prove fatal within 12-18 months of diagnosis, with people in Britain believed to have a one in 300 risk of developing the neurological condition. About one in five cases are believed to be related to genetics, and it was announced last year that relatives of people with the condition were to be offered genetic testing that would tell them if they were also likely to develop it.
Moody, who won English and European titles with Leicester during his playing career, told BBC Breakfast two weeks after learning he had the disease that he felt “at ease” as he sought to concentrate on his immediate wellbeing, his family and preparing for the future.
“Maybe that’s shock or maybe I process things differently, and once I have the information, it’s easier.”
He discovered he had MND after noticing some weakness in his shoulder while training in the gym, the BBC reported. After physiotherapy failed to improve the problem, scans showed nerves in his brain and spinal cord had been damaged by MND.
“You’re given this diagnosis of MND and we’re rightly quite emotional about it, but it’s so strange because I feel like nothing’s wrong. It’s never me that I feel sad for,” added an emotional Moody. “It’s the sadness around having to tell my mum – as an only child – and the implications that has for her.”
And he spoke of the difficulty in telling his two teenage sons. “We sat on the couch in tears, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog jumped over and started licking the tears off our faces, which was rather silly.”
