\n<\/p>\n
Y<\/span>ou can learn a lot about British society from what children bring into classrooms. Take sex toys, Lee Parkinson says. He co-hosts the highly popular Two Mr Ps in a Pod(Cast) with his brother Adam \u2013 they both work in primary schools \u2013 and their inboxes are bursting with stories from teachers of X-rated show-and-tells.<\/p>\n \u201cYou would not believe,\u201d Lee says.<\/p>\n \u201cInundated,\u201d Adam nods. \u201cHonestly, a variety of objects.\u201d There was the child who brought in the Harry Potter wand that wasn\u2019t. \u201cAnd the kid was like: \u2018I tried to get it working but it just kept buzzing.\u2019\u201d Then there was the child whose pretend hearing aid turned out to be a cock ring. And the second world war gas mask that was \u201ca full-on, PVC gimp mask\u201d, Lee adds. Adam, who works as a higher learning teaching assistant, recalls a time <\/strong>when one pupil proudly showed <\/strong>him his end-of-year gift for the class teacher: a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. \u201cHe\u2019d taken it off his mum\u2019s nightstand.\u201d<\/p>\n The Parkinsons\u2019 latest book, How to Survive the School Year, is a portrait of the alarmingly high <\/strong>rates of embarrassing incidents in the classroom and beyond. Anecdotes sent in by their audience of teachers and parents shows that sports days are a hotspot for comical mishaps. Adam once split his trousers playing football with the kids, and had to deliver his big presentation on behaviour later that day in a pair of rugby shorts.<\/p>\n The brothers \u2013 I want to call them boys, because all their riffs and ribbing seem to summon their childhood selves to the minature table we are sitting at in Adam\u2019s classroom in Walkden, Greater Manchester \u2013 happily bat stories to and fro.<\/p>\n In publicity material, Adam is the one who pulls silly faces, while Lee does his best to look sensible but fun. In person, the dynamic is more nuanced. Lee, at 40, is the eldest of three (middle brother Ryan works in sales) and the original Mr P. He coined the name when he launched his ICT (information and communications technology) training business in 2013, <\/strong>which he combines with <\/strong>teaching a Year 4 class part-time at another nearby primary, and a platform to coach teachers in the use of AI to reduce their admin.<\/p>\n <\/span>Swings and roundabouts \u2026 the teachers are all too aware of the highs and lows of the profession.<\/span> Photograph: Fabio De Paola\/The Guardian<\/p>\n Lee very much wears the long trousers, metaphorically and literally. Today he has helped himself to the only adult chair in Adam\u2019s classroom (\u201cHe took my teacher\u2019s chair!\u201d). Adam, 36, is wearing shorts, having returned victorious from a tri-golf tournament with his Year 6s \u2013 he\u2019s still clutching the trophy \u2013 and fidgets in a tiny plastic seat. They\u2019re constantly in competition mode, and still vie for the position of \u201cnumber one son\u201d. (Lee is now on top, having been awarded an MBE last month.)<\/p>\n Adam is known as The Other Mr P, which you\u2019d think might put him at a disadvantage. He blurted it out when he was introducing himself on the very first podcast, and the name stuck.<\/p>\n So he othered himself? \u201cI don\u2019t mind, because Lee worked tirelessly for five, six years before we started,\u201d he says. \u201cAnd this whole thing has led to a life that I never thought possible.\u201d<\/p>\n Back in 2018, the Mr Ps were on holiday in Florida, sipping beer in a hot tub after a day in one of the parks, sharing stories from their classrooms. \u201cWe were just trying to outdo each other with the most ridiculous thing that\u2019s happened in our schools,\u201d Lee says. \u201cI thought: \u2018We should sit down and record these. Do a podcast\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n Adam had never heard of a podcast but later he came up with the name over dinner in Buffalo Wild Wings in Kissimmee, Florida. Lee bought the microphones as soon as they got home, and the podcast took off. During lockdown, it became a sort of communal staffroom for teachers who were estranged from colleagues, working remotely, or supervising the children of key workers. Now Two Mr Ps in a Pod(Cast) has had 7.5m downloads, and in October the brothers take their Let That Be a Lesson \u2026 tour to venues from Edinburgh to Exeter.<\/p>\n But while their three books (the previous two being Put a Wet Paper Towel On It and This Is Your Own Time You\u2019re Wasting) are full of things going comically wrong, increasingly the Parkinsons receive messages from teachers about things going seriously<\/em> wrong. Burnout, workload and behaviour are the recurrent issues.<\/p>\n \u201cThe number one reason for teachers leaving the profession is workload,\u201d Lee says. Although he believes \u201cthat\u2019s going to get overtaken by behaviour \u2026 There is a growing number of cases where teachers and senior leaders are being verbally, or in some cases physically, assaulted by parents. And there\u2019s the online trolling \u2013 parents openly being negative about teachers online.\u201d<\/p>\n Lee is hyper-alert to attacks on teachers. We meet in the midst of a heatwave and the fan is going full pelt. Lee enters into a tirade against \u201cthe person who designed primary schools and decided to make it too cold in winter and the surface of the sun when we get a bit of nice weather. What was the mindset? Why do you want to stitch us up as teachers?\u201d Even summer term, with its fetes and sports days, dupes staff with \u201ca false sense of security\u201d. Truth is, they\u2019re behind on the curriculum having crammed for SATs, an exam which Lee thinks has \u201cno bearing on children\u2019s academic development other than an understanding that life\u2019s not fair and most of the important things in your existence will be decided by idiots like Michael Gove\u201d.<\/p>\n He is especially exercised about Ofsted. \u201cIt is, in my opinion, one of the main reasons we\u2019ve got 40,000 teachers leaving the profession a year … Ofsted say they raise standards and improve lives. Well, they were found to be contributing to the death of a teacher,\u201d Lee says, referring to Ruth Perry, the head whose death by suicide was linked by the coroner to her school\u2019s Ofsted inspection. \u201cSo you can\u2019t say they improved lives. She wasn\u2019t the first and she won\u2019t be the last unless things drastically change.\u201d<\/p>\n He has had teachers contact him with similar stories. \u201cWhy create a framework that makes teachers\u2019 workflow go through the roof exponentially, plunging them into this boiling pot of stress and worry?\u201d<\/p>\n <\/span>Main goal \u2026 the brothers highlight the increasing stresses that teachers are put under.<\/span> Photograph: Fabio De Paola\/The Guardian<\/p>\n Changes to Ofsted inspections are due to be published in September, but the proposals have already been met with opposition. \u201cI think they\u2019re not capable of reforming themselves. What we need is a working party of people outside Ofsted, working with Ofsted to make necessary changes.\u201d This sounds like a job he might enjoy. \u201cI\u2019d have a discussion,\u201d he says. \u201cBut I don\u2019t think they\u2019d want to hear from me.\u201d<\/p>\n Lee didn\u2019t always feel like this. He started teaching in 2007, \u201cstraight from uni\u201d. He\u2019d just turned 22. Labour\u2019s Sure Start programme was in full swing. \u201cHe loved it,\u201d Adam says. \u201cAnd I loved the thought of doing what he was doing.\u201d At the time, Adam had been going \u201cfrom job to job\u201d: Next, Co-op, Iceland, Odeon cinema, six months of data handling at Ofsted (\u201cI didn\u2019t know what Ofsted was when I worked there. If I had, I would have messed up all the things!\u201d) and volunteering as a rugby coach in a primary school.<\/p>\n One day, his aunt, a children and families officer, asked him to volunteer one-to-one with a child who was struggling with his behaviour, and in isolation out of class. \u201cI struck up a real bond with him. I absolutely fell in love with working in a school.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s fair to say that Adam was able to relate. Of the three brothers, he was the one who their parents were always being called in to school to discuss. Mostly for wrestling with other children and making rude gestures. He was diagnosed with ADHD at the end of primary school. \u201cI was medicated through secondary school,\u201d he says. \u201cIt helped me massively.\u201d He would take his meds each morning, then button his blazer. \u201cAnd I\u2019d look in the mirror, because I knew the saying, Looking smart\u2019s halfway to being smart<\/em>, and I swear I was a different child.\u201d<\/p>\n Adam points to Lee, and the empty space between them, which has acquired the identity of their middle brother. \u201cThey were a lot more able in terms of the work than I was. And I don\u2019t mind admitting that. I\u2019ve done well<\/em>, I think, with what I\u2019ve got \u2013 to get to where I am.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMy mum and dad always say, if he\u2019d been the first, they\u2019d never have had another kid,\u201d Lee offers.<\/p>\n \u201cOh, he loves this!\u201d Adam says, feigning indignation \u2013 or perhaps not feigning. His legs are bouncing wildly in that tiny chair. In the way of the best family joshing, it\u2019s both good-natured and close to the bone. You get the feeling they can \u2013 and often do \u2013 go on for hours.<\/p>\n \u201cAre they not Mum and Dad\u2019s words?\u201d Lee asks.<\/p>\n \u201cMBE! This guy!\u201d Adam shrieks.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m just relaying information,\u201d Lee says, leaning back in his teacher chair with a wink.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat was the card you got on Father\u2019s Day for Dad?\u201d Adam says.<\/p>\n \u201cFrom your number one son?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo! It wasn\u2019t!\u201d Adam\u2019s voice rises in triumph. \u201cIt was, \u2018Sometimes you just get it right first time.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n For a moment, it seems as if they never left home. They\u2019ve always been close and more alike than Ryan. \u201cWe like spicy food. He hates spicy food. We were always drinking blackcurrant squash, but he\u2019d have orange,\u201d Adam says.<\/p>\n <\/span>\u2018Mum and dad always say, if he\u2019d been the first, they\u2019d never have had another kid.\u2019<\/span> Photograph: Fabio De Paola\/The Guardian<\/p>\n Both Mr Ps are parents themselves. Lee has 14-year-old triplets and a 21-year-old stepson. Adam has a daughter, nine, and a six-year-old son.<\/p>\n Increasingly, he has posted about his experience as what he calls \u201ca Send dad [special educational needs and disabilities] \u2026 Because it took me a long time to accept what the situation was, and learn,\u201d he says. After his son was diagnosed with autism, \u201cI would say I grieved for the life I expected. I worried if he would ever make friends, be invited to parties, or join a sports team.\u201d<\/p>\n Adam\u2019s son\u2019s diagnosis has led him to reflect on his own. \u201cSometimes autism and ADHD really clash.\u201d While his son enjoys being read the same story repeatedly, Adam finds the repetition challenging. \u201cThe last thing I ever want to do is not be there for my son and not give him what he needs,\u201d he says. He has started to wonder whether taking \u201ctablets again would help me \u2026 relax a bit more. I\u2019m a bit of an overthinker. I do struggle with that.\u201d<\/p>\n His son has an education, health and care plan (EHCP) and attends special school, having left mainstream education when the one-to-one care his EHCP legally entitled him to had to be shared with other children who needed support but didn\u2019t have EHCPs.<\/p>\n The schools minister has recently refused to rule out replacing EHCPs, which have become fraught with problems, since the number has risen by 140% in the past 10 years while councils run deficits. Should they be scrapped? \u201cThere\u2019s got to be a legally binding document to ensure children get the education they deserve,\u201d Lee says. \u201cBut is the current system working? No. Do education, care and health have to be rolled up or can there be a separate education plan? Are we able to create something that can make mainstream a lot more inclusive?\u201d<\/p>\n The Parkinsons speak every day. Do they ever get sick of each other? \u201cHe\u2019s like my fifth child,\u201d Lee says. \u201cAdam can be one of the funniest people on the planet. There\u2019s times I think: how do you function as an adult?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI feel I bring his silly side out,\u201d Adam says. \u201cAnd at times he brings my serious side out, and we complement each other. But you couldn\u2019t have two me\u2019s because \u2026 Well, I wouldn\u2019t know how to plug a mic in.\u201d<\/p>\n For all the jokes, they have had days where they\u2019ve gone home and cried. Adam has worked in a number of schools, including in Manchester. <\/strong>\u201cThere are days when you\u2019re driving home, thinking, wow, that was a really hard, sad day. I\u2019ve worked with teachers who have been hit or kicked \u2026 I\u2019ve had all the children crying. And that\u2019s the saddest thing for me. Because for a lot of children, if they have a tough home life, this is their escape, their solitude.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019re faced with the biggest retention crisis we\u2019ve ever seen for what should be the best job in the world,\u201d Lee says. But he wouldn\u2019t recommend teaching to his children. \u201cYour job as a parent is to protect your kids. I feel like the current education system can break people \u2013 the expectations put on teachers, where you\u2019re expected to do more with less, and you\u2019re constantly made to feel like a failure, and you\u2019re under this incredible pressure and the sort of compassion fatigue teachers feel, working in a system that no matter what you do, no matter how many hours you dedicate \u2013 you are still seeing the system fail some children.\u201d<\/p>\n But sometimes a teacher will message them or come up to them \u2013 this happened to Adam at the tri-golf tournament earlier \u2013 and tell them that the podcast has kept them going, or brought them back to teaching, because, Adam says, \u201cwe shine a light on the amazing things and the hilarious things\u201d.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s a real privilege to have quite a big impact on a profession that is so special,\u201d Lee says. What they really want is for teaching to be \u201crespected and valued by everyone\u201d.<\/p>\n How to Survive the School Year: An Essential Guide for Stressed-Out Grownups is published by HarperCollins (\u00a316.99). To support the Guardian order your copy at guardianbookshop.com. Delivery charges may apply.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You can learn a lot about British society from what children bring into classrooms. Take sex toys, Lee Parkinson says. He co-hosts the highly popular Two Mr Ps in a Pod(Cast) with his brother Adam \u2013 they both work in primary schools \u2013 and their inboxes are bursting with stories from teachers of X-rated show-and-tells.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9899,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[57],"tags":[439,496,70,859,2539,337,436,2538],"class_list":{"0":"post-9898","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-education","8":"tag-classroom","9":"tag-education","10":"tag-hit","11":"tag-ive","12":"tag-kicked","13":"tag-life","14":"tag-teachers","15":"tag-worked"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9898","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9898"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9898\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/9899"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9898"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9898"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9898"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}