\n<\/p>\n
A<\/span>re you dreading a high-stakes meeting, a challenging professional task or an awkward conversation? I\u2019m not, because I\u2019m a craven coward who has dodged that kind of unpleasantness for years. If only I had a \u201cpower phrase\u201d to activate, maybe things would have been different.<\/p>\n That is the psychotherapist Amy Morin\u2019s advice for dealing with sticky situations. The author of The Mental Strength Playbook, Morin explained in Business Insider that a \u201cshort, positive sentence you say to yourself in the moment\u201d is an effective two-minute cognitive reset. She used hers, she says, while answering challenging questions to land her book deal: \u201cI activated my power phrase and told myself, I\u2019m a strong, straightforward communicator.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n Cynics (me) might pull a face and find the concept cringey; why not stand in a power pose while you\u2019re at it? They (I) might also suggest it sounds like a rebranding of \u201cgiving yourself a little talking-to\u201d\u00a0\u2013 something everyone does in stressful situations, unless you are the kind of sublimely nonchalant, confident superhuman who thrives on pressure.<\/p>\n But simple and cringey can be effective. Morin points to a study that suggests positive self-affirmations can help people solve problems under pressure, and another that indicates they activate reward and \u201cself-processing\u201d systems in the brain and can lead to\u00a0behavioural change.<\/p>\n Huh. When I absolutely must<\/em> do something difficult, my pep talk traditionally inclines towards negging\u00a0\u2013 \u201cJust do it, you spineless worm\u201d\u00a0\u2013 or nihilism. \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter, you\u2019ll be dead soon,\u201d isn\u2019t obviously inspirational, but I find it obscurely comforting.<\/p>\n I\u00a0have, however, been haunted in recent months by the wise thinker Oliver Burkeman\u2019s mantra for people daunted by change or the prospect of working on themselves (still me). We need to ask ourselves, Burkeman says, \u201cHow\u2019s that working out for you?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNot great\u201d is the answer, I suppose: I\u2019ve avoided challenging myself for so long I now dread stuff as pathetic as returning defective trousers or overhearing my husband have a hard phone conversation. It\u2019s no way to live, so maybe I do, in fact, need a proper, positive power phrase? Let\u2019s try it out: \u201cI am a reliable, competent writer and I can finish this column.\u201d Wow, it works!<\/p>\n Emma Beddington is a Guardian columnist<\/p>\n Do you have an opinion on the issues raised in this article? If you would like to submit a response of up to 300 words by email to be considered for publication in our <\/em><\/strong>letters<\/em><\/strong> section, please <\/em><\/strong>click here<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n