{"id":13960,"date":"2025-08-04T13:24:29","date_gmt":"2025-08-04T13:24:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/?p=13960"},"modified":"2025-08-04T13:24:29","modified_gmt":"2025-08-04T13:24:29","slug":"how-the-muppets-helped-me-grieve","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/?p=13960","title":{"rendered":"How the Muppets Helped Me Grieve"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\n<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW ArticleParagraph_dropcap__uIVzg\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\" data-flatplan-dropcap=\"true\">J<span class=\"smallcaps\">im Henson\u2019s Creature Shop<\/span> has sat, for the past 16 years, on the fourth floor of an office building in Long Island City, New York, behind a metal door that looks like any other. When I opened it one gray morning after the holidays, I was greeted by a plastic Christmas tree hung with fake fish skeletons and desiccated banana peels, Oscar leering nearby from his can, and a brown, fuzzy blob sitting on a table. At first I thought it might be a complete Muppet, until I saw, a few yards beyond, a matching brown, fuzzy, headless body. As the archivist Karen Falk began to lead me on a tour of the workshop\u2014drawers of googly eyes, noses, and \u201cspecial facial hair\u201d; filing cabinets for \u201cfur\u201d and \u201cslippery sleezy\u201d; a stack of banker\u2019s boxes, one marked \u201cGrover,\u201d another \u201cBoober\u201d\u2014I looked back, briefly, to catch the bulbous nose and round eyes of Junior Gorg from <em>Fraggle Rock<\/em> staring at me, or perhaps at his own body, waiting to be reunited.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">\u201cThere are only three Snuffleupagi in the world,\u201d Falk told me, gesturing toward a puppet near the entrance that she said was kind of an extra, deployed when Snuffleupagus needs a family member on set next to him. I reached out to give Snuffy\u2019s relation a little pet\u2014his soft brown fur, curly and dense like a poodle\u2019s, was overlain with orange feathers\u2014and scribbled a note: \u201cremarkably lifelike.\u201d <em>For a what?<\/em> I later asked myself. <em>For a giant woolly mammoth cum anteater puppet?<\/em> But the space made it easy to slip across the human-Muppet divide and into Henson\u2019s world, where the realness of the puppets is sacrosanct. When I asked to take a picture of the decapitated Junior Gorg, just for my notes, Falk looked at me as if I\u2019d asked to check under Miss Piggy\u2019s dress. \u201cWe don\u2019t allow photos of things like that, Muppets without heads,\u201d she tutted, and ushered me to another part of the workshop, where a handful of archival boxes had been set aside for me.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">After a great loss, some people find themselves communing with nature, at the seaside or deep in a forest. Others turn to spirituality, toward a temple or church. Me? I\u2019d come to grieve with the Muppets.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW ArticleParagraph_dropcap__uIVzg\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\" data-flatplan-dropcap=\"true\">M<span class=\"smallcaps\">y father, Marshall,<\/span> amassed many accolades over the course of his career\u2014a gold record for playing bluegrass banjo on the Deliverance soundtrack; an Oscar for co-writing the script of <em>Annie Hall<\/em>; a Tony nomination for Best Book for the musical <em>Jersey Boys<\/em>, which won Best Musical in 2006 (and an Olivier Award, too)\u2014but way cooler to me, as a kid, was the fact that for a brief stint, long before I was born, he\u2019d been part of Henson\u2019s crew.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">For much of my life, I knew little about the specifics. I do remember one time being feverish and crying for a Kermit doll after a doctor\u2019s appointment, even though, despite Dad\u2019s involvement in the show, I can\u2019t remember ever watching any <em>Muppets<\/em>, or even <em>Sesame Street<\/em>, at home. The local toy store was all sold out, so Dad called in a favor, and we headed to the old Muppet offices on the Upper East Side to pick one up. While we were waiting, I watched, slack-jawed, as puppet makers working on a new creation pulled googly eyes out of thin drawers, one after another, a fever dream come to life and branded in my memory like a surrealist madeleine. After that, the Muppets all but receded from my life.<\/p>\n<p id=\"injected-recirculation-link-0\" class=\"ArticleRelatedContentLink_root__VYc9V\" data-view-action=\"view link - injected link - item 1\" data-event-element=\"injected link\" data-event-position=\"1\">Read: The secret life of grief<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">That changed after my father got sick last year, when my daily life became not just a logistical mire\u2014managing therapy appointments, speaking with doctors\u2014but also one of constant dread: about which Dad I\u2019d find when I walked into his room each day, his personality somehow refracted, as if I were looking at it through a prism; about whether a middle-of-the-night phone call might signify an Earth-tilting inflection point; about how devastating it was going to be to navigate the world without the beloved father I\u2019d always looked up to.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">At the end of each day, like any well-adjusted individual faced with looming, profound change, I chose to run screaming as far away from reality as I could, which is how I ended up in the arms of the 1970s Muppets. I had no grand plan. I simply gravitated toward their fluffiness and goofiness as an antidote to grief. I sensed\u2014rightly, it turned out\u2014that they\u2019d help keep me afloat.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW ArticleParagraph_dropcap__uIVzg\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\" data-flatplan-dropcap=\"true\">D<span class=\"smallcaps\">ad and Henson<\/span> first connected through Al Gottesman, Henson\u2019s longtime lawyer. Their mutual affinity makes total sense to me, even a generation later. They were born three years apart and grew up delighting in <em>Kukla<\/em>, <em>Fran and Ollie<\/em>, and Walt Kelly\u2019s <em>Pogo<\/em> comic strip. They shared an off-kilter sense of humor and a reverence for the silly. Although I can\u2019t remember ever seeing Dad with a puppet on his hand, when I was growing up he would put on elaborate bedtime shows for my sister and me, starring our menagerie of stuffed animals. Using a pair of needle-nose pliers from his tool case\u2014a bulky, black-leather valise full of primary-colored screwdrivers I liked to play with, a relic from his days attending Brooklyn Technical High School to appease his practical immigrant father\u2014he made pince-nez out of a paper clip for my plush dachshund, Ollirina, a feisty Southern grande dame who propelled herself around by farting (my contribution); he then had her perform miraculous acts of levitation. Dad\u2019s tried-and-true finale: shooting my Ping-Pong-ball-sized plush hedgehog through a toilet-paper-roll cannon as I drumrolled on my lap. Looking back on this now that I\u2019m a parent of three young children, I marvel that he could summon this level of creativity after dinnertime.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">For a few months in the mid-\u201970s, Dad helped Henson write a failed Broadway Muppets revue, and what would become the pilot of <em>The Muppet Show<\/em>, called \u201cSex and Violence With the Muppets\u201d\u2014Henson\u2019s attempt to establish the Muppets as not just for kids. Dad is listed as head writer on the script, in which Nigel, Sam the Eagle, and a few other Muppets put together a \u201cSeven Deadly Sins\u201d pageant to determine which sin is the most deadly. Although the final show evolved from the pilot\u2014Kermit replaced Nigel as the emcee; a human guest star was added\u2014you can see from the script that its style was already developed, as was its tone: equal parts outlandish and sophisticated, countercultural, never talking down to the audience. Sloth arrives, of course, during the closing credits, too late to participate. One stage direction reads, simply, \u201cChaos in progress.\u201d The script established the framework with which Henson would go on to parody a vaudeville show from all angles\u2014the divas (Piggy), the technical malfunctions (Crazy Harry, blowing up sets left and right), the well-meaning guy trying to hold the whole ball of crazy together (Kermit).<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">My father\u2019s contributions are impossible to disentangle from the general Muppetness of the script\u2014collaborations work, he always told me, because they are collaborative\u2014save for one: Despite being Brooklyn born and bred, with not a Nordic bone in his body, he is, by many accounts, the source of the Swedish Chef\u2019s accent and nonsense lexicon, the one typified by \u201cHurdy, gurdy, gurdy, bork bork bork!\u201d The character had originated with Henson in the \u201960s. Back then, he\u2019d been German. For reasons lost to Muppetdom, at some point the character moved northwest, to a place with more centralized health care. And he needed an accent to match.<\/p>\n<p>Andrea McCallin \/ Disney \/ Getty<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">I loved listening to Dad parody foreign languages. He liked to throw off telemarketers by answering the phone as a hard-of-hearing woman from some indeterminate Latin American country, or as an eccentric Central European man, characterized by a sibilant, Peter Sellers\u2013as\u2013Strangelove delivery that would typically escalate into a shriek and send the person on the other end skedaddling to their next call. So I was not surprised to learn that, decades earlier, Dad had apparently reduced the Henson puppeteer Frank Oz to tears by mimicking languages during brainstorming sessions. He later made an ersatz-Swedish tape for Henson to listen to on his commute into the city from his home in Bedford. \u201cHe would drive to work trying to make a chicken sandwich in mock Swedish or make a turkey casserole in mock Swedish,\u201d Henson\u2019s son Brian told Jim\u2019s biographer, remembering having heard my dad\u2019s tape. \u201cIt was the most ridiculous thing you had ever seen, and people at traffic lights used to stop and sort of look at him a little crazy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">All of this I learned from books, from interviews with Muppet staffers, and by emailing Falk, the Henson archivist. But the bulk of my embedding in Muppetdom over the past year involved watching <em>The Muppet Show<\/em> with my husband and three kids on weekend evenings, our world cocooned between the real, live present and a completely nonsensical 1970s. I\u2019d slice up some apples and we\u2019d cackle together as Rita Moreno flung a noodly Muppet man around set in a particularly violent tango; as Zero Mostel, only mildly indignant that a Muppet was eating him during his cold open, helped wash down his own arm with a little water; as Gene Kelly taught Kermit to tap-dance on the piano.<\/p>\n<p id=\"injected-recirculation-link-1\" class=\"ArticleRelatedContentLink_root__VYc9V\" data-view-action=\"view link - injected link - item 2\" data-event-element=\"injected link\" data-event-position=\"2\">Read: The father-daughter routine that transformed our family life<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">Given what I\u2019d learned, was it a cosmic sign that my youngest, just 3 years old, started to develop an obsession with the Swedish Chef? He took to running around the apartment, crowing his bastardized version of the Chef\u2019s already bastardized Swedish and then, mimicking his new Nordic hero, flinging into the air whatever he had handy. Sometimes it was a stuffed animal; other times it was hard objects, which would necessitate a stern lecture (after my husband and I had taken cover) about the dangers of throwing things up, because they tend to come down, even if the Chef\u2019s flapjacks do not. After my son got a Swedish Chef action-figure set that included a small chicken and a handful of cooking tools, he would sit on the ground, brow furrowed in concentration, making the cleaver-wielding chef hop after the chicken\u2014or sometimes, in keeping with Muppet sensibility, vice versa.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">My daughters became obsessed with \u201cPigs in Space,\u201d a recurring Muppet sketch parodying Star Trek and other space operas of the 1960s and \u201970s. They erupted in cheers whenever the USS Swinetrek flew across the screen, indicating that the sketch was back again. The setup is that three pigs are flying through the cosmos\u2014Captain Link Hogthrob, Dr. Julius Strangepork, and Miss Piggy as first mate\u2014and \u2026 nothing really happens. John Cleese shows up as a pirate and tries to make a call from a payphone on the ship, while his parrot, who is in love with him, gripes that Cleese is neglecting her and should take her to dinner with all his doubloons. The ship is invaded by two alien beings, who turn out to be the Swedish Chef and his chicken, and after they leave, the pigs get bored. When the USS Swinetrek nears the end of the universe, where its crew will finally discover the meaning and purpose of life, the dinner bell rings, and the pigs get sidetracked. Miss Piggy is routinely degraded, asked by the boars to do the laundry or make more swill, though the audience understands that she\u2019s smarter and tougher than her male co-stars.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">According to Oz, Miss Piggy\u2019s puppeteer, her toughness was hard-won. In multiple interviews, he has spoken about his need to understand the complete biographies of the characters he portrayed, even if viewers don\u2019t share that need. In Oz\u2019s mind, Miss Piggy was born on a farm, loved her father very much, and was grief-stricken when he died in a tractor accident. As her mother\u2019s subsequent suitors turned their attention to Miss Piggy, a single path forward emerged: to leave. She was later forced to do some things she wasn\u2019t proud of as she clawed her way to diva-dom, including appearing in a bacon commercial.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">Does any of that come through the screen as she floats around in outer space? I suppose that, for some viewers, it does\u2014that having a deep understanding of Miss Piggy\u2019s character somehow enabled Oz and the other puppeteers to present her simulated world as real enough that the audience would jump into it with her, feetfirst, willingly suspending disbelief.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">Or maybe that\u2019s not why it works. \u201cIt\u2019s just so <em>weird<\/em>,\u201d my third grader said to me one night, with a snort. \u201cLike, why are there even pigs <em>in<\/em> space?\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW ArticleParagraph_dropcap__uIVzg\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\" data-flatplan-dropcap=\"true\">I <span class=\"smallcaps\">didn\u2019t experience<\/span> what others warned me I might, after the months of decline that led to Dad\u2019s death late last year: picking up the phone to call him and forgetting that there would be no one on the other end, looking up from the sidewalk at the window where he worked for decades, expecting to see the light on and being knocked sideways that it was dark. I never forgot. I never expected the light to be on. But occasionally, I\u2019d find myself dropping from one reality straight through to another, something most likely aided by my living just eight blocks from where I grew up. My neighborhood is saturated with memories spanning my whole life.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">Passing a street corner, I would suddenly reverse-age four decades and see Dad\u2019s belt buckle sliding along my tricycle\u2019s handlebars, because I was so hot and sweaty and tired that I simply couldn\u2019t pedal one more inch, and he was pulling me around that corner, home. I\u2019d be running the Lower Loop in Central Park, where we used to take our daily afternoon walks, and I\u2019d pass a busker playing the fiddle and have to stop, hands on knees, to catch my breath, remembering the Flatt and Scruggs Dad played through his computer speakers. These temporal shifts through eras were uncontrolled, unexpected, all-encompassing. My scrim between reality and memory, truth and simulation, had become porous, faulty. Like the Swedish Chef, who starts making a turtle soup only to find that the turtle has woken up and is trying to escape, my reality was pitched, slightly, on its axis.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">The first time one of these temporal shifts through eras, one of these free falls from today back to childhood, happened was a few nights after the burial. My husband, kids, and I gathered, the children freshly showered and damp-haired, and put on the Muppets, as we\u2019d done, at that point, for months. The episode featured Se\u00f1or Wences, the ventriloquist whose main act involved Johnny, a boy made from Wences\u2019s hand, on which he stuck two googly eyes, and on top of which he draped a ridiculous orange wig. His other star performers were a bespectacled chicken named Cecilia (Wences: \u201cSecond name?\u201d; Cecilia: \u201cChicken\u201d) and Pedro, a surly talking head (literally just a head, not an MSNBC type) who, after a train accident that decapitated the poor puppet, spent his life, disembodied, in a box.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">The episode\u2019s conceit was that Kermit has decided to do something new: a puppet show! \u201cIt\u2019s a complete change of pace, folks,\u201d he said to cheers. \u201cYes, it\u2019s a real first!\u201d Toward the end, Wences held up an egg and asked Cecilia Chicken to identify it. As she replied, softly and directly, \u201cMy son\u201d (rhymes with <em>moan<\/em>), a memory of childhood weekend breakfasts welled up from deep in my subconscious, collapsing time just as the puppets on-screen were collapsing their simulation. I saw the kitchen table, the oval wooden one my father had waxed by hand until it shone. I felt its slight stickiness beneath my hands. And by the stove was Dad, apron halved and tied around his waist, holding up an egg reverently, sighing, lovingly pronouncing it \u201cmy son!\u201d in Salamancan-inflected English, then cracking it, with a flourish, into a cast-iron skillet.<\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\"><em>He used to do that with eggs.<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"ArticleParagraph_root__4mszW\" data-flatplan-paragraph=\"true\">I\u2019d completely forgotten. For a moment, I stayed there at the kitchen table, giggling. I stayed with the feeling of being closer to my children\u2019s age than middle age; closer to those evenings spent cross-legged and damp-haired myself, watching my dad turn stuffed animals into performers; closer still to a moment years before my birth, when, across town at the Henson studios, in a healthy body with long legs kicked up on the desk in front of him, my dad held a bulky tape recorder to his mouth, paused, then started up for the first time in ersatz Swedish, the beginning of a thread that would reach out, decades later, and tether him to me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jim Henson\u2019s Creature Shop has sat, for the past 16 years, on the fourth floor of an office building in Long Island City, New York, behind a metal door that looks like any other. When I opened it one gray morning after the holidays, I was greeted by a plastic Christmas tree hung with fake<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13961,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[55],"tags":[7624,7623,7622],"class_list":{"0":"post-13960","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-social-issues","8":"tag-grieve","9":"tag-helped","10":"tag-muppets"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13960","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=13960"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13960\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/13961"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=13960"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=13960"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/naijaglobalnews.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=13960"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}